Have you ever wanted to Host or Foster?

We have done both, as I have said. Well, it wasn't always something we have wanted to do. When we first started the process of fostering there was a lot of hesitation. What if we didn't do things right? What if the kids didn't like us? What if the parents didn't like us? What if we didn't have room? What about school? What about work? What about meetings? What about drivers' licenses, cars, and insurance? What about our dog? Girls? Boys? Ages? And then there are chores?
What is very interesting is that many of the same questions can be asked about exchange students. We have had kids from age 2 years old to aging out. Some haven't liked us either. We have been crowded sometimes but we have always made room. Usually we have had no complaints about having to share. The only ones who actually complained were exchange students. We have had so many kids at some times that we have spent HOURS at the school during conference time, and that was with some of the kids having the same teachers.
Exchange students can't get drivers' licenses and foster kids are not supposed to either. We feel if the foster can prove him or herself with the social worker and us then we should consider it, though they would have to get a job and pay insurance. After all, how many teens in the US live for getting their license?
Most all the kids have loved, or at least put up with our dogs. And funny, though we have gotten the dogs from shelters, they have put up with the kids as well.
Chores are important for self-esteem, and to help out the family. How many of you care about your child having a perfectly clean room? Is it that important if they help in the main part of the house where all the visitors come? That is how we feel. No food in their rooms, and then you don't have to worry too much about bugs. And why not teach them to use the washer/dryer. It sure saves you time and they learn something for independence, that as an adult they may need at some point.

Exchange Students

Yes, there are some great students. We have had some. We have also had some who were not so great. One such girl was one from an Asian country. She turned 18 while she was here so her friend said she didn't have to listen to her host family. She lied to us. She came home after curfew. Then one day we got a call from the police. She had gone shoplifting. We didn't get the help we should have from our agency person so we brought her to her.
We have never been called by the police for any foster kid because they were shoplifting. We also had a student who was cutting herself, something we have never had a foster kid do.
Remember, foster kids can be as good as, or better than some exchange students.
I feel one of the biggest problems with exchange students is that they don't realize what a BIG change it is going from home where everything is familiar to a home where almost nothing is familiar. Language, showers, school, parents, siblings, and even pets are different.
I think the best students are the ones who can realize everything is different, they MUST be able to accept change, and they like to learn. They are the ones who want to be involved with their host family, even if it is to do a simple thing like playing a board game. They don't have to be perfect and they need to realize host families are not perfect.
I will write more in a day or two. Ask me some questions.

If I don't know about it, maybe my mother-in-law does.

If I don't know about it, maybe my mother-in-law does.

If I don't know about it, maybe my mother-in-law does.

I wanted to start talking about things. First, I thought about baking. Well, that can be part of it. I also want to talk about hosting exchange students, having foster kids, and my own kids (names changed to protect the privacy, and innocent). If anyone wants to reply to my blog, change the names please. Everyone deserves privacy, even you. I have hosted students for 15 years. I have been a foster parent for 6 years. And last but certainly not least, I have had my own children all live to be adults.
We have travelled with them, gone to movies, baked, BBQ'ed, and done many other things. I have had over 30 teens come through my house throughout these many years. Sometimes it is fun! And sometimes it has been not so fun.
There have been boys, girls, and siblings here. We have had exchange students and foster kids while having my kids at the same time. What a way for everyone to learn about the world from so many perspectives! We have had 5 teens living in the house at the same time. The first thing we learned was to make a written list of rules for eveyone to follow. Next we learned to make compromises. We have learned to listen to many different kinds of music, eat different kinds of food, and do different kinds of things.